economic crisis solution...someone else's thoughts 10/5/2008

I don't know who this guy is or where this idea came from but to my uneducated mind, it sounds great!  Will someone with some knowledge of the stock market please tell me why this won't work?  Or will it???
This is his idea:
I'm in favor of giving $85,000,000,000 to America in a We Deserve It Dividend.

 To make the math simple, let's assume there are 200,000,000
 bonafide U.S. Citizens 18+.

 Our population is about 301,000,000 +/- counting every man, woman
 and child. So 200,000,000 might be a fair stab at adults 18 and up..

 So divide 200 million adults 18+ into $85 billon that equals $425,000.00.

 My plan is to give $425,000 to every person 18+ as a
 We Deserve It Dividend.

Of course, it would NOT be tax free.
 So let's assume a tax rate of 30%.

 Every individual 18+ has to pay $127,500.00 in taxes.
 That sends $25,500,000,000 right back to Uncle Sam.

 But it means that every adult 18+ has $297,500.00 in their pocket.
 A husband and wife has $595,000.00.

 What would you do with $297,500.00 to $595,000.00 in your family?
 Pay off your mortgage - housing crisis solved.
 Repay college loans - what a great boost to new grads
 Put away money for college - it'll be there
 Save in a bank - create money to loan to entrepreneurs.
 Buy a new car - create jobs
 Invest in the market - capital drives growth
 Pay for your parent's medical insurance - health care improves
 Enable Deadbeat Dads to come clean - or else

 Remember this is for every adult U S Citizen 18+ including the folks
 who lost their jobs at Lehman Brothers and every other company
 that is cutting back. And of course, for those serving in our Armed Forces.

 If we're going to re-distribute wealth let's really do it...instead of
 trickling out  a puny $1000.00 ( 'vote buy' ) economic incentive that is being proposed by  one of our candidates for President.

 If we're going to do an $85 billion bailout, let's bail out every adult U S
 Citizen 18+!

 As for AIG - liquidate it.  Sell off its parts.
 Let American General go back to being American General.
 Sell off the real estate.
 Let the private sector bargain hunters cut it up and clean it up.

 Here's my rationale. We deserve it and AIG doesn't.  Sure it's a crazy idea that can 'never work.'   But can you imagine the Coast-To-Coast Block Party!
  How do you spell Economic Boom?

 I trust my fellow adult Americans to know how to use the $85 Billion
 We Deserve It Dividend more than I do the geniuses at AIG or in Washington
 DC.

 And remember, The Birk plan only really costs $59.5 Billion because $25.5
 Billion is returned  instantly in taxes to Uncle Sam.