Monday, May 16, 2011

they saved the back row for us; part 2

As I wrote tonight of the love I'm experiencing in community, I'm reminded of a time when I was struggling. (just one other time)
I escaped out of the house and found myself on the way to a church close by.  I was so hungry to hear from God, to sense His presence, to find peace.  I sneaked in the back after the service had started, (I know, late again) and found a seat a little off to the side and in the back.  I had let my shoulders drop, taken a big sigh and my eyes began to fill up with tears.  Ahh, sweet love of God.  At that moment, a woman came up, touched my shoulder and said, "Ma'am, you can't sit here".  "Why?", I inquired.  "We need everyone to sit in the middle section."  I said, "Can I please just stay here?".  "I'm sorry ma'am, you're not allowed to sit here."  I stood up and walked quickly out, the tears streaming down my face.
What was going to be a healing time was stolen. I wasn't going to jam myself into a pew with 20 other people that night.  I was too tender.
I hear of many people eschewing organized religion.  I understand where they are coming from.  I know that lady was just doing her job, but she missed the bigger picture.  She forgot that the church is the people.  She thought it was a well functioning service program with the pews filled properly.  What a tragedy.  The only redemption is that I'm glad it was me.  I can separate the people from the message if necessary.  But there are others who can't.  I hope they are not herded and handled but are loved and healed just as I was when the back row was especially saved for me.

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